Saturday, January 23, 2010

Freeloader




Hey folks

Here is my first pass of my pantomime test. Changed the acting in the second part to make it more natural and still got to to tighten the timing . Let me know what you guys feel

cheers
vinay

18 comments:

jEEvith said...

hey,
hhahahha.. nice one vinay.. loved the turn at 0:03,
n i guess the ending is little long(after 0:12 onwards), i mean hes taking too much time to fall down, can go down much more earlier..maybe 30-40 frames earlier...
jus wat i felt.. u know..
neways, loved it over all..;)

cheeeeerrss...

damncreative said...

True dude. As i said i need to re time it. Even i feel its too slow, Will do that. Thanx for the comment bro

cheers

Unsound said...

nice one vinay... love the acting... though the turn after looking at the pastry felt a bit odd to me... i cant quite put my finger on it, it just looked a bit unnatural (to me)...

damncreative said...

Hey vedanth i quite didnt get you.Odd as in ? Please do explain

Prasad said...

This looks great now ! Loving every part of it ...sorry for my last reply ...i said 'dramebazi' and all that ...felt awful about then ...but hope now you will more satisfied that you got rid of that thing :)

Unsound said...

ahhh the neck thingie, but then i know u gonna clean up in later stage..

I feel he's taking A HUUUUGE step when he goes frm 03:00 to 04:00 as the whole thing is cartoony (atleast to me it looks cartoony) it would feel more natural to take a cartonny step...

let me try to explain what i've in mind....

in your shot the body, leg head all moved together...

what i had in mind is Ist the leg then the body arches back(bending away from cam) and then he pops into the spot... and as per timing a little over shoot and settle... The entrance of presto magician in Ist shot (as he's eating something) is what comes to my mind....

also the when he's looking back i feel his head is twisted too much maybe turning chest towards cam may make it more natural...

I JUST ABSOLUTLY LOVE UR second half... its bloody detailed and awesomely done... with that then starting 5seconds looks like it wasnt given as much attention as the last half...

I hope i didnt overstep in my comments...

Unsound said...

sorry for posting again....

i suggested that turning thing cause i felt it would add more enegry... like he has seen something which he really loves and he POP's into the spot... all ready to eat the sweeet delicious tempting (*drooooool* oh wait where was I oh ya) cake and cant wait to taste it

damncreative said...

Hey vedanth thanks a lot for the comment. It helps a lot.Really appreciate. Yes i think i have twisted the head too much hehe. Ill change that for sure. I get what you are talking about the body and the leg timing , will surely do it in the next pass. Was concentrating too much on the second half. It was too long since i had done a acting shot. So didnt much bother about the walk and stuff. But will surely look into it. Thanx again vedanth

damncreative said...

Haha prasad yes i got rid of that cliche stuff. Even i didnt want. M happy i found a better acting choice

Deepak Arasu said...

Hey very nice one Zee, I loved it.
And the comments - 1. right now it looks like he is chocking after eating the pastry (which is not solid but a semi liquid). It would be great if the pastry was a lil spicy and he gets chocked swallowing that spicy pastry.



2. Acting wise the thrill is to make him have a attitude before he picks up the cream. Say he could be a very modest guy or a caustious guy whos very neat and clean. He has an attidue of an actor(u know:)) then you the shift of his attitude over spicyness. Though you have tried to show this up through his body language, it could be shown more through his facial expressions.
Right now it looks like he is feeling normal, rather than having an attitude.



3.Story wise, a structure is required(since it is a pantomime). I think you will need a little work to establish the character. In the end you are missing an oppurtunity for a twist in the story. he eats the pastry and then falls down, which is anticipated but give the audience a twist in the story before he falls down.(I read the book:))

4. Last one - can you change the pastry to a double creamed milkshake coz I like milk shake (kidding) :)


But trust me I enjoyed the animation, nice work :)

Deepak Arasu said...

Hey Chandu am sorry dude, i wasn't able to comment back the other other day. Hope you have submitted by now.

whoami said...

Hey Deepak, no problem. I submitted and got 45th position among 134 entries. It is OK, as I had done a dialogue shot after a year and it was my first attempt for the 11 Sec Club. Hope to keep improving. I will post more as I progress.

whoami said...

And I didn't have to do anything with the position, but just wanted comments from people and wanted to see where I stand amongst other animators around.

Xylem said...

Oyeee...Nice man!!! Great. Listen, i dunno if this will work or not. But when he steps back to taste the food. Try giving that wave, I dunno, kinda felt like it needs a lil. Awsome man!!! Now I know d difference between blocking and 1st Pass. :)

damncreative said...

Hey deepak. Woooahhh, thats some awesome comments dude. I agree with all the pointers. yes i guess spice would work better . But the idea behind this was the cake is stale foos. Actually i idea was totally different when i started off. I ended up with this cos of time constrain . You know what i mean. Will look into it and change as much as possible in the next pass. Thanx a lot bro

Xylem i get what are trying to say but i wanna keep it more character oriented . I kinda had that swing before. but i removed it. It was looking too obvious. Ne way will see what i can do

dapOOn said...

love it dude! however i wish u had held him a teeny weeny bit longer in the last stretched out pose (0:14 secs) before he actually falls down! rite now i feel he fell down TOO fast (like, without warning the audience! lol)! otherwise it's BRILLIANT!!

damncreative said...

Dapooooooooon. Yes dude. Ill surely add that tweeny eeny ness in the next pass for sure . Thanx a lot

Nilabh said...

That's a great piece. The way his mouth moves while tasting it feels so real!
Great work!